The call of self-discovery rings in all our spirits. Right now in mine, it’s ringing off the hook! As I finish up a continuing education program in spiritual intuitive coaching, I find it necessary to embrace the idea of myself as a work in progress.
Who are you? What are your goals? What do you want from life? These questions buzz in my heart and mind, and in my conversations with my own coach. And deep down, I don’t want to hear this call! I want to turn on Do Not Disturb. I want to hang up on this period of uncertainty and arrive…somewhere. Somewhere perfect where I won’t have to ask these questions anymore.
As a women’s mindset coach for 20 years, I am lucky enough to practically understand what I am going through. Growing pains! The truth is, I will never be able to stop asking these questions, checking in with my spirit, and aligning with my purpose. That daily work is part of an examined life. But darn if it isn’t exhausting.
Part of my work coaching for breakthrough success is leading clients to an understanding of the balance between allowing growth and arriving at milestones. The pressure to “arrive” in a finished product, without any growth needed, remaining rough edges, or questions, is constant. And, this pressure starts at a very young age in all modern human cultures. Just consider these statistics:
The Mental Health Foundation of the United Kingdom found that 57% of young people have been so stressed with fear of making mistakes, they have been unable to cope. 39% have experienced suicidal feelings because of stress.
8% of Americans constantly feel dissatisfied with how they look, no matter what they are doing or wearing, or who they are spending time with, according to a 2018 study on behalf of RiverBend Mental Health.
2020 marked a 50-year low in American unhappiness, with only 14% of Americans saying they were “very happy” in a study by NORC at the University of Chicago. This was down from 31% in 2018.
I believe a lot of this unhappiness manifests from comparison. We don’t even have to be comparing ourselves to others. Sometimes we are just comparing ourselves to our younger selves, or to an ideal that we want to achieve.
That comparison doesn’t just stress us out, but the resulting stress holds us back from doing the work to eventually become that person we want to be. And guess where the stress lands? In our bodies.
For instance, getting in shape doesn’t happen overnight, even though every time we look in the mirror we desperately want to see that more fit, toned version of ourselves. But if we get too fixated on wanting immediate gratification, we don’t act to get what we want because it will take too long.
We have to allow the progress to happen little by little and forgive ourselves for any mistakes that happen along the way. The same applies to learning new skills, or even just learning who we are. We can’t expect to answer the call of self-discovery in an instant and arrive at a perfect state of satisfaction. We have to allow periods of change and embrace how things transpire.
This mindset and manifestation coaching is the growth I am going through, even as I finish learning how to help others better achieve these outcomes. We are all a beautiful work in progress that will never really be completed and that’s okay. In fact, it’s exciting, because we get to keep growing, learning, and amazing ourselves and others.
The worst thing to do in response to this reality is get stuck. If you need a partner to help you through similar experiences and create space for the next phase of your journey, let’s connect.